Tuesday, February 22, 2011


If I learned anything out of this nightmare, it’s that Kurt and I have no patience. We don’t have to move. We were only moving because I’m homesick. But now we’re busting to get out of here. Busting I tell you! Yes, not finding out the buyer couldn’t get her mortgage until two days before the closing caused everything to be in an upheaval. It caused financial difficulties, logistical problems, lost opportunities and at the least, it inconvenienced everyone. But that’s not the reason that we suddenly have to get out of here like the place is on fire.

It’s like being in a car crash. You’re going 60 miles per hour; suddenly, you hit a wall. Screech! Boom! The car stops but you keep going. It goes against the forces of nature to stay in your seat like nothing happened and the broker tells your buyer, “Look for another house—it was probably a blessing in disguise,” like you can just turn the station on the radio or readjust your GPS. Like it’s nothing. Like there’s something not great about your house! But you’re already in motion. So what was once going to be a leisurely exercise—we had been planning to hunker down for the winter—has turned into a lesson about patience. I’ve learned we don’t have any. Coming to a screeching halt makes me crazy to find a way around this detour.

And there’s no reason. Jersey is still going to be there when we find another buyer. The winery house might even still be there. Who is going to buy that thing? You can’t get a C.O., you can’t get a mortgage, I just found out right before all this happened that you can’t even insure it. It’s as as-is, as as-is gets, and nothing is hooked up so you can’t test or inspect anything. Who else is going to have the gonads to take a chance that when they buy that house, they don’t get in there and discover that the septic is shot or the well water is polluted? How many Debi-and-Kurts are there out there?

(The seller obviously believes she is going to sell that house because she refused to give us a house-selling contingency.)

Plus, the good part is we don’t have to move in the dead of winter. Can you imagine, moving a whole farm and a business (not to mention the kid) to another state and to a house with no heat in freezing temperatures and then trying to build some sort of horse shelter and fencing in a three-week period while there is snow on the ground? We’re crazy I tell you!

Maybe Bill is right. Maybe this is a blessing in disguise. For me. Not my buyers. They won’t find a place that’s better than this, in this price range. Someday, when they look back, they will be kicking themselves that they didn’t try harder to make this deal happen. Me? I’m going to recalculate and turn left at the next sunny day. The riding arena is just waiting out there and if I am patient enough, maybe, just maybe, I’ll hear my mother’s voice again.


Beth said...

You're right, Debi...it is so hard to be stopped in your tracks when you have that rapid forward momentum towards one goal. It's such a shock and so frustrating when it happens. But I'm so glad you're getting to the point where you're able to see the potential good in it and the good that's all around you there in that beautiful place. I think your Mom is right---it's all going to eventually work out for the better.

By the way, that photo is amazing. It made me laugh out loud. Did you take it?

Tanya said...

Yes, you've got it right! I'm sure the winery will still be there, maybe even at a better deal by then! Did you hear your mother's voice?
And I loved the line about taking a left at the next sunny day!

Sweetflutterbys3 said...

You know, as soon as you get to move it'll all come clear why you had to go through this. And when you do move, it'll be even better. Cause you wanted it more. At least that is what I've found whenever this kind of stuff happens to me, which is more often than not!

Nezzy said...

I'm so sorry but I soooo understand. I'm spastic...don't sit still well and I certainly don't wait well at all. I also know your sweet mamas voice is right...for some reason the timing is not perfect and God has the perfect plan. When the time is right everything will fall into place even though it may be totally exasperating right now.

Hang in there sweetie!!!

God bless ya and have a wonderful day!!!

Jeff said...

When you sell your place, what you do is make the winery house owner a lower offer. She must think the market is really hot for her house if she won't give you a contingency. Your "buyer" suffered from buyer's remorse, methinks. Where do you find such riotous photos - a miniature horse in the back seat of a car?? What a hoot!!

Cape Coop said...

Just breathe deep and often, go with the flow, keep on making plans and more plans- if my life means anything- it shows that everything that you will can happen!
Oh, and the owner of the winery? Her first name has to be Deluded.
you'll end up paying less for that property or you'll end up here in something better. I just wish that you would end up here quicker!
I could use a real time buddy!

Sweetflutterbys3 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
claudia said...

Nightmare..but , as you said, maybe a blessing in disguise for you guys. Maybe a BETTER place is waiting for you and your horses.Gotta trust. I lost my first place I tried to buy up here and was heart sick, then I found this one online...I love my house and land..and the neighbor curmudgeons are actually coming around!..Trust.

Greener Pastures--A City Girl Goes Country said...

Tanya, yes I did hear my mother's voice. Right after the deal fell through, when I was really upset about it, I was outside picking up manure, I wasn't even thinking about my mother, and all of a sudden I heard her voice, as if she was standing right next to me, clear as day. She said something like, "Don't worry Debi, it'll all work out better, you'll find a better house." Something to that effect. It instantly gave me great peace.

That photo was something I stole off the Internet. I knew that I'd be able to use it someday!

Thanks guys.

Cape Coop said...

I heard my mother's voice once, after she had been gone for 8 years.
She put her hand on mine and spoke to me clear as a bell, and saved my life.

Greener Pastures--A City Girl Goes Country said...

Rebecca, what did she say?!

Grey Horse Matters said...

I can understand how you feel but I'm a big believer in things happening for a reason. The right person will come along to buy your house and if you still get the winery house that's great but if not maybe something even better will be in your future. Don't get down, just go with the flow even though it's hard. Good luck.

Horses Are Our Lives said...

I would be very impatient also (even though I'm working really hard to be patient!) Yes, once you want to go back home, it makes you more homesick. (But really, that flat land of NJ for the beautiful rolling hills???) lol, remember I'm from PA, living in NE, and can't wait to get back to the hills. It is better to move when there is no snow! I wanted to let you know of the Stylish Award and you found it already! congrats, and I enjoy reading your blog.

CountryDew said...

I have found that the older I get the less patience I seem to have.

Things will work out for you. They always do, don't they?

Christina said...

I'm sorry but I cant seem to focus on anything but that picture. Reminds me of when they brought Midnight the mini horse to the rescue. The lady brought him over in her mini van. He is as big as the guard donkies and I still cant believe he jumped in that mini van.

Motley said...

I don't have time for patience!