Saturday, April 9, 2011

Signs


All my flowers are blooming. The first one that came up was my mother’s. It’s a tulip. Jamie’s boyfriend Lou’s mother gave it to her when she was first in the hospital. She wasn’t allowed to have any plants or flowers in her room so she gave it to me because she knew I wouldn’t kill it. No one else in my family gardens. I carried it down to Virginia in its pot covered with crinkly pink foil. It was carefully wedged between a suitcase and a cooler filled with pork roll and cannolis from the Italian bakery. I planted it next to my back steps so I could see it all the time. It died right away. I thought that was a bad sign. And I was right. My mother died too.

The following spring I fixed up that little area by the back steps. I put mulch down and made a border out of Kelly’s collection of glass insulators. The colored glass looks really pretty when the sun is shining. I put an old tin watering can there that my neighbor from Jersey gave to me because she knew I liked old things. I put a metal sculpture of a grasshopper there that my mother bought for Kelly’s room when she was a baby. I added a couple of pretty rocks that I found, one with white streaks of quartz in the shape of a cross (I considered selling that one on eBay—“Woman sees Jesus on a stone!”), and another rock shaped just like Jersey. I put a dot on the spot where the winery house would be with black Magic Marker.

Then, when I was in Peebles, they had one of those fake rocks for sale that you hide your house key inside. I would never hide my house key in one of those because everyone knows what they’re for. Might as well hide it under the doormat if you want to be stupid. But I liked it because it had a copper plate in the middle with a picture of a butterfly on it. My mother loved butterflies. So I bought it and I put it right in the middle of the little plot of earth by my steps. Every time I go up and down, I look at it and think about my mother.

Last week I was on my hands and knees weeding when I spotted something green sticking out from underneath the fake rock. I picked it up. It was the tulip! Two springs have gone by since it died and here it was again, nosing up through the mulch, muscling its way from underneath the fake rock that was on top of it.

I took that as a sign. I really don’t know what kind of sign it is. Hope? A sign that my mother lives on even when I thought she was gone? A simple sign of spring? I don’t know. But it’s something good.

14 comments:

Sweet Virginia Breeze said...

Perhaps its a sign that your mother is with you. She knows that you think of her when you look at the pretty collection you assembled by your steps. She is adding her addition just for you.

Grey Horse Matters said...

I'd say that tulip is definitely a sign. This may not make sense but it might mean that your mother is still with you and watching over you even though she's gone in the physical sense.

zenmama said...

I'm sure it's your mother saying: "Wow, this is great. I love what you've done here." You've created a place for her spirit to peep through.

Tammy said...

She's with you. That's what it means. :)

Chris said...

Yes, yes and yes!

Tanya said...

oh this gives me chills and YES, it's a sign, from your sweet mama....it's a sign to let you know she's with you and she's fine! amazing story!!!

Christina said...

I havent seen those glass insulators in years. We would always be so excited as kids at my Grandmothers when we found them.

CountryDew said...

A lovely post.

Sweetflutterbys3 said...

Your garden is so full of meanings and memories. What a nice place for your mom's flower to bloom again.

Peggy said...

Hi! Thank you for all the lovely comments you've left on my blog. I love your blog, I've been reading it quite a bit this morning (procrastinating). Much of it made me cry. Sorry for the loss of your mother. What a beautiful story about the horse that was returned to you. I'm sure that was a gift from your mother. Sounds like she's always with you.

Is it correct that you are moving back to New Jersey? Very interesting. I recently left Cleveland and then returned for very similar reasons. Wonder why we treat each other so badly?

Anyway, thanks for sharing your story, and I look forward to following it.

Love,
Peggy

Cynda said...

Of course that was a sign of your Mother! She is always with you Debi.

Greener Pastures--A City Girl Goes Country said...

Thanks friends.

Peggy, yes, I'm going back to Jersey. I'd like to hear YOUR story--where you went and why you returned to Cleveland.

Greener Pastures--A City Girl Goes Country said...

Thanks friends.

Peggy, yes, I'm going back to Jersey. I'd like to hear YOUR story--where you went and why you returned to Cleveland.

Horses Are Our Lives said...

I believe in signs. God gives us what we need when we need it. That's what I believe. And I believe that God won't give us more than we can handle ... even though many of us usually tell God "that's enough!" I'm glad you had a sign. Many times, they are right in front of us, and we just need to see it, or find it. Thanks for commenting on my blog. This kind of went with my recent 2 blogs, too.